Take the time to reach out, said New York City-based sex therapist Gracie Landes , pointing to the example of a client who assumed her husband was disinterested in sex based off another therapist's observation. Even if we know better intellectually, a part of us often tells us that your desire to have sex has more to do with putting your thing in a warm spot, and less to do with knowing, loving, or connecting with us. Once the couple is back in the practice of acknowledging each other's needs, Ghose tells them to take turns initiating sex. Once you have identified which issues in the sexless marriage help checklist are most relevant to you, you can check out marriage help books , websites, therapists or therapy programs specific to the underlying problem you have identified. Tweet When the sex disappears from a marriage , people usually mention that they feel more like an adult sharing a room with someone instead of a married person. Try not to be defensive when you hear certain things from your spouse, because they are important to fixing your marriage. The strength of your marriage determines your strength in other areas of life. There is not just one answer or solution to repairing this type of problem. Statistics shows that the number of marriages lacking in sex is increasing. For the full article on How to Save a Sexless Marriage, check out: Jessica Andrews has been in a loving relationship for the past 2. The partner with the higher sex drive will need to understand and respect that these efforts are being made, and should take some comfort in them. Thomas Barwick via Getty Images Get out of your head and really connect with your spouse. The good news is that you can change it once you know, and you can eventually change their opinion as well. Another myth regarding sex regards age. Moreover, if your communication is getting you nowhere, then you need to get help.